Chickens and Eggs

Two months before the Los Osos recall election in 2005, I was on the phone with Steve Monowitz, the point man for the California Coastal Commission on the sewer project, and I pleaded with him, practically begged him, for his office to issue a press release clarifying why there was a $2.3 million public park in the Tri-W project.

The reason we ended up on the phone that day, is because about a month earlier I sent him a graphic created by Save the Dream, the citizens group formed to promote the Tri-W project, that said the park amenities in the project were required by the Coastal Commission.



Having done my extensive homework, I knew that graphic was going to piss Monowitz off, because he, and the Coastal Commission, have bent over backwards throughout the years to accommodate the initial CSD's nonsensical "project objective" of a centrally located public park in their sewer plant, a CSD Board that included County Parks Commissioner, Pandora Nash-Karner.

The Commission even went as far as amending the Local Coastal Plan in 2002, so it could make room for a "sewer-park" at Tri-W. (Bent over backwards to accommodate that ridiculous little park... so much work.)

So imagine Monowitz's surprise when I fired off that e-mail that contained a graphic that said the nonsensical, embarrassing park was his idea.

But what pushed him over the edge, was that the newsletter that contained the graphic was created by former CSD Director, current County Parks Commissioner, and, at the time, marketing director for Save the Dream, Pandora Nash-Karner -- the same person that made Monowitz unnecessarily jump through about a million hoops four years earlier, because she, as a CSD Director, told him there was a "strongly held community value" in Los Osos for a centrally located sewer-park. (Obviously, there's not, nor has there ever been. And even if there was at one time, which there wasn't, what a stupid reason to choose a downtown sewer plant! Public opinion, as public opinion survey experts have told me, is like shifting sand, and becomes "outdated" in just six months.)

Wait. This story gets better, because I still haven't explained why we ended up on the phone that day.

About a month after I sent Monowitz the Save the Dream newsletter, I received an official LOCSD document from a good source, that again said the amenities were required by the Coastal Commission. This time, in an official document.



Of course, I also fired that graphic off to Monowitz. I knew he was going to be piiiiiiissssssed!!!! After all the crap they put him through to accommodate the park, now they were blaming the park on him. Ouch! Talk about a gut punch.

In that second e-mail I also asked him to put me on the mailing list for the press release that I assumed his office was going to issue clarifying just exactly how things like a $690,000 dog park ended up in the Los Osos sewer plant.

That's when my phone rang. It was Monowitz. He wanted to know why I thought his office was going to put out a press release on the park topic. And I told him something along these lines, "Steve, don't you see what's going to happen? If your office doesn't clarify why the park is in the project, then that extremely important point will never be countered, and everyone in Los Osos is going to think that it was the Coastal Commission's idea to put a multi-million dollar park in their sewer plant."

I've spoken with Monowitz a number of times over the years, and you're not going to find a nicer, more mellow guy. During that phone call, I could tell he was fuming from those graphics that I sent him.

And that's when he got loose with this blast, "It galls me when they say we added the amenities." That's one of my all-time favorite sewer quotes.

Steve, gall understandable, my friend, gall understandable.

But, the Coastal Commission never issued the press release that I begged for in 2005, so today, many folks in Los Osos now believe that the sewer plant "had" to go downtown because there was no other place to put it, and the park was just a by-product of the location, a $2.3 million by-product forced upon the taxpayers of Los Osos by the California Coastal Commission.

That's why many of those same folks today say things like, "If the damned thing is buried, why the hell NOT use the above ground area for a park, restroom, playground, etc.?"

The town's highly confused, just like I predicted in that phone call.

And, because the Coastal Commission never released that press release, SewerWatch was left to hoe that field alone.

I'm going to beg again: Coastal Commission, please, for the love of God, I'm begging you, issue a three-paragraph press release clarifying why there's a park in the Tri-W project.

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The Gord-O-Meter

[Note :: 8/11/07: I had the "Gord-O-Meter" in the template section of my blog for months, but I got sick I seeing it all of the time, so I moved it here... seemed like an appropriate place.

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SewerWatch Presents:



Ahhhh... bummer... it looks like the computer script that makes the Gord-O-Meter funny isn't going to work in the post section of the blog. Damn! Oh well, here's what it was: I found a script that counted up, in days, hours, minutes and seconds, and then I put that count-up in front of the following text, so it read something like this: 180 day, 14 hours, 28 minutes, and 52 seconds has elapsed since SewerWatch exposed that environmental activist, recalled Los Osos CSD Director, former Solution Group member, and self-described “San Luis Obispo Coastkeeper”, Gordon Hensley, can stop polluting the waters of California by installing a composting toilet system -- a system that the Regional Water Quality Control Board said “will” improve the water quality in Los Osos -- but has yet to do so."]

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Is it pronounced Gord-OH-Meet-er or Gord-OM-eter, you know, like odometer? Either way, the circumstances demanded it.

I'm going to leave the Gord-O-Meter at the top of this blog until Gordon Hensley, an environmental analyst and recalled LOCSD Director, either puts in a composting toilet system, stops referring to himself as the "San Luis Obispo Coastkeeper," or I get sick of seeing that graphic (and it's my guess, it'll be the latter).

[Re-Posted here: 11/09/07...]

Gordon Hensley Never Played Little League

[9/17/07] I can tell that recalled Los Osos Community Services District Director, Gordon Hensley, never played organized sports while he was growing up, because one of the many beautiful life-lessons gleaned from participating in team sports as a youth is that you can't win them all, so when you lose, lose with dignity and class, and Hensley, hands down, is the worst loser I've ever seen.



Los Osos, he's about to sue you, again!



Click here to download a pdf file (622k) of his letter describing his intent to sue the Los Osos CSD... again.



When you read that letter, keep in mind that Hensley is THE San Luis Obispo Coastkeeper. It's just him, according to web sites. Then notice how he makes it seem like SLO Coastkeeper is some type of benevolent, concerned environmental organization, when, in reality, it's just a bitter, recalled LOCSD Director. Also notice that he never once refers to the fact that he is a recalled LOCSD Director, that was primarily responsible for unnecessarily ripping up the Tri-W site in the first place.



Finally, also keep in mind that Hensley voted to schedule his own recall election date at one of the latest possible dates, and that afforded him the window of time to begin site work (a.k.a: a bunch of huge earth moving tractors ripping up "environmentally sensitive" stuff) at the Tri-W site... just four weeks before Los Osos voters would throw him out of office. I wrote about that here. (Boy, is that a horrible law in the election code. What were they thinking?)



That's the kind of mind set that Los Osos has dealt with since 1999. Little wonder the town is in such a mess.

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Is there a Rosa Parks in Los Osos?

Los Osos, it's time to throw some tea overboard. It's time to not move to the back of the bus. It's time for some serious defiance.

But for any defiance to work in this case, you must work backwards.

If you've received a Cease and Desist order from the Regional Water Quality Control Board, the very first thing you need to do to successfully defy the Board is fill your septic tank with sand, or cement, or whatever they use these days to officially decommission them. That's exactly what the Water Board has been demanding since 1988, when they amended Resolution No. 83-13 to prohibit sewage discharges in Los Osos.

To make sense out of what to do next requires some foundation.

According to reports, the RWQCB has told Cease and Desist Order recipients that composting toilets are not an option in the prohibition zone. However, from a 2004 RWQCB document, where staff is explaining the Board's options in Los Osos, it reads:

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[All bolding mine]
Require Alternative Waste Disposal Units – The Regional Board could (through General Waste Discharge Requirements, Cleanup and Abatement Orders, or Cease and Desist Orders) require use of alternative waste disposal units.

Advanced treatment units (for improved effluent quality), portable toilets and/or composting toilets (for reduced discharges, as discussed in previous section regarding prohibiting black water discharges) could be required. Such units could be required for existing discharges using Cleanup and Abatement or Cease and Desist Orders, or for new discharges using General Waste Discharge Requirements.

Pros: For those existing discharges where such alternatives are implemented, water quality improvement will occur. If General Waste Discharge Requirements are adopted by the Regional Board which authorize development of vacant lots, then this method may also provide benefits similar to those described under the 'Rescinding Resolution No. 83-13' section above.

Cons: Widespread implementation of this alternative would result in more costly waste treatment and less effective water quality protection than that offered by the community sewer. However, it remains one of the few alternatives, which can result in water quality improvement and is not subject to Coastal Commission approval. The previous discussion about the questionable availability of this huge number of outhouses, would also apply to availability of other types of alternative treatment methods.
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Wow.

Notice how their "cons" have nothing to do with things like feasibility and nuisance, instead it says stuff like, "Widespread implementation of this alternative would result in more costly waste treatment."

That quote tells me two things: 1) Widespread implementation of this alternative is possible, and 2) "would result in more costly waste treatment," is not even close to being accurate, unless they mean by the reluctant few that hold out for a community sewer system, because that would "result in MUCH more costly waste treatment" for them. And even if it was more costly, the cost of "the few alternatives, which can result in water quality improvement" is entirely up to the property owner.

Then they say that composting toilets offer "less effective water quality protection than that offered by the community sewer."

How is that possible? What part of "zero" in "zero discharge" am I not getting? In reality, the use of such a system would dramatically reduce a household's water use, therefore aiding all kinds of water issues in the area, including the saltwater intrusion problem in Los Osos. It appears that hi-tech, environmentally friendly, composting toilets offer much, much more "effective water quality protection than that offered by the community sewer."

That means their only other "con" is "availability," and that's simply a terrible argument. Why don't we leave the availability question up to the composting toilet manufacturers? I'm sure they would relish the opportunity to make them available.

It appears, according to the RWQCB's own documents, there is no downside with composting toilets, and lots of up side, and if you ask me (and I'm sure just about every attorney not associated with the Water Board, as well) that all adds up to tacit approval to install a modern, hi-tech composting toilet system.

An excellent source knowledgeable in these matters recently told me, "They said what they said, [composting toilets are] on the table as a viable option. The decision (the dollar one) is for the discharger. As a discharger, it is my decision how I meet the discharge order (within certain codes and guidelines). Remember, the RWQCB never mandated a sewer, they prohibited a discharge."

Then the source added, "Seems to me it would make a great test case. Take one of those houses with the C&D and show the Board their working composting toilets and they should be off the hook... and that's a hook from them as well as from anything the County is cooking up."

To handle other sewage needs, like shower, dish and laundry water, you'll have to install an appropriate modern, hi-tech greywater recycling system. According to web sites, that system, through a series of filters, reverse osmosis, and other treatment methods, would clean your water, return it for reuse, and some models have the entire system under your house, out of sight. (What sucks about having to purchase a greywater system in this deal, is that if your septic tank is 30 feet or more above the groundwater, as many homes are in the prohibition zone, RWQCB documents state that you could be granted an exemption to Resolution 83-13 that would allow you to continue to use your septic tank just for greywater. But since they are a bunch of incompetent, vindictive, a-holes, they are not going to do that. And so they are going to force you to shell out for the cost of the greywater system, and to decommission your septic tank, just to cover their ass. Jerks.)

Septic tank filled with sand? Check.

"Advanced" composting toilets professionally installed to ensure that your only "black water" discharge is to your unobtrusive composting bin (that's housed in an attractive compartment in your backyard), and that the RWQCB considered requiring? Check.

Greywater recycling system in place? Check.

Generator purchased in the event of a blackout? Check.

Congratulations. Not only are you not discharging a drop of anything, but you now own a model home for handling wastewater in the most environmentally gentle method possible, at about a quarter of the cost of hooking up to a community sewer. And you didn't have to rip up your street to do it. Dare I say... better, cheaper, faster.

Now -- and here's the good, dramatic, tea-overboard, "No, Mr. bus driver, I will not move to the back of the bus," act-of-defiance part -- after your new systems are installed and operating perfectly, show up at your scheduled RWQCB meeting, and when it's your turn to appear in front of that group of... is "sadistic clowns" too harsh?..., bring a paper shredder with you to the podium, and, without saying a word, take your copy of the Cease and Desist order, hold it up high so everyone can clearly see what it is, flip on the shredder, pop that sucker in, and then hold the machine up above your head during the duration of the CDO shredding process, as the Board sits there and watches. They won't know what to say.

Then simply turn, and grin, and walk out of the room with your hand a-waivin'. Buh-bye Water Board, been nice knowin' ya.

And if they still want to come after you for violating Resolution No. 83-13, say, "I'll see you in court, assholes," where you will easily win, because you are not discharging anything but compost, and they are going to have to make the argument that compost is a discharge, and even if they do -- and it would be laughable to watch them try -- the compost can simply be trucked out of the prohibition zone by some enterprising septic business, and sold as fertilizer to the county for its golf courses, thus offsetting the cost of the systems, and it's still zero discharge in the prohibition zone. Oh, and one more thing, IT WAS THEIR IDEA!

Their arguments would be so weak, I can't imagine how they would pursue it.

Plus, as if it couldn't get any more embarrassing for the Regional Water Quality Control Board, they would be going after you because you chose the fast-track route that they said "will" lead to improved Water Quality. Man, that'd be fun to watch, and report on.

Win that, and you will, and everything sewer related in Los Osos will be in your rear-view mirror. Do that once, and there will be no sewer.

Is there a Rosa Parks in Los Osos?

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The SewerWatch prediction for Los Osos in 2007: It's going to be a beautiful year

My predictions for 2007:

By year's end, Los Osos will be a model community on how to handle sewage, as the entire community installs hi-tech, modern, composting toilets, a solution that officials with the Regional Water Quality Control Board say will immediately lead to improved water quality in the region.

Micro-loans of about $5,000 will be supplied by the State of California to cover the cost of the system and its installation.

The building prohibition in Los Osos will be lifted.

And cottage industries will sprout up in the area to service the systems and profit from the compost.

It's going to be a beautiful thing.

According to a RWQCB document, composting toilets are not only an alternative to a sewer system, they considered "requiring" them in Los Osos.

The document reads, "Advanced treatment units (for improved effluent quality), portable toilets and/or composting toilets (for reduced discharges, as discussed in previous section regarding prohibiting black water discharges) could be required."

It continues, "For those existing discharges where such alternatives are implemented, water quality improvement will occur."

Which brings up the $150 million question: Will the RWQCB rope Los Osos into building a $150 million sewer system just to handle dishwater, and such, or will they allow property owners in the prohibition zone to install composting toilets, achieve "zero-discharge" black water, and then just use their septic system for grey water? And, according to documents, every property owner that chooses that route will not have to pay for the sewer, and other property owners will have to pick up that portion of the sewer assessment, until the monthly sewer assessment is so great that everyone else will simply install modern composting toilets, arguably a preferred method of... how should I put this?... relieving oneself.

The staff at the RWQCB all but rave about composting toilets. In their document, it reads, "... it remains one of the few alternatives, which can result in water quality improvement and is not subject to Coastal Commission approval."

Not subject to Coastal Commission approval.

In another State document it reads, "Under certain circumstances, grey water systems may be an acceptable method of disposal in conjunction with a composting toilet or holding tank to handle black water. Grey water systems shall be installed in accordance with the California Plumbing Code (24 Cal. Code of Regs., Part 5) and the local administrative authority. If properly constructed and operated, grey water systems are not expected to create a nuisance or pollution."

In another State document it reads: "The use of composting toilets should be encouraged because this will help address nitrate problems."

A brilliant wastewater expert in Canada recently wrote:

"Here is an interesting situation: Los Osos could provide every resident with a composting toilet and greywater processing flower bed for less than the cost of a new sewage treatment plant.

Voila....low cost, environmentally innovative, no nasty effluent into groundwater or the ocean, no significant draw down of potable water supplies.

And no debate about who has the sludge or sewage treatment in their backyard.

Los Osos, like Victoria British Colombia, Halifax Nova Scotia, and King City Ontario could look at composting toilets to meet their community needs. With large scale installations and professional municipal maintenance, the rewards could be immense."

Absolutely brilliant.

A web site dedicated to composting toilets reads:

"If a community were to embrace the total use of composting toilets and appropriate greywater systems, it would have no sewage charges, sewage pipe installations and maintenance costs.

The community would also have greatly reduced water costs.

It could also reduce its rubbish collection charges through recycling most vegetable matter, and would be able to produce valuable compost and worm castings for sale or reuse in community and private gardens."

I recently sent an e-mail to Mark Fong of the State Water Board's Division of Financial Assistance, that read:

"Hello Mr. Fong,

I was wondering if you could tell me if there is a small State loan available for a property owner that wants to install a composting toilet so they can stop using their septic system for black water discharges that are polluting groundwater?"

If he responds, I'll post it.

I'm tellin' ya, it's going to be a beautiful year in Los Osos.

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